Deep Dark Secrets

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

{kiss the groom photography}

I recently told one of my best friends (hey tay!) about Love, Julie for the first time. She loved it, of course but I was apprehensive about first telling her because I don't tell just everyone about my blog. My family reads it and most of my friends by now but when acquaintances ask about it, I get a little embarrassed and I am not quite sure how to answer the questions, "What do you write about?", or "How do you have time to do that", or, "Isn't it weird talking to people you don't even know?"

Another part of this is the fact that I am not quite sure I am ready for everyone I have ever met to know my opinion on rose pink peonies, my etsy wish list, and my love of dessert crepes. I guess it is sort of like when you invite two different groups of friends to a party and when they all arrive you don't know how to act because you act differently with different groups of people... Maybe that's just me...

Anyway, I wrote this because I want to know about you. Do you tell everyone about your blog, attach it to your personal facebook, sign every email you send with the url? Or do you write mostly for yourself and keep your blog completely separate from your "real world" life?

I can't wait to find out!!!

33 comments:

Leslie *Fresh Out of Lemons* said...

This is a good topic! When I first began my blog, I had to settle on the fact that-- if I wanted readers-- they would be people that I know, at least in the early days. My little site couldn't grow without spreading through my network. But you're right, there is something weird-feeling-inducing about having "real life" people read about your life. I think that the friends out on the world wide web feels safer because (a) they're usually also bloggers, so they can understand this experience and (b) they only get the "you" that you portray in your writing, if that makes sense. While I think (and hope) that we all write to be authentic, we're still creating an image.

Interestingly, my most "active" readers (or at least commenters) are not my friends. They all seemed to get tired of my writing after a while, though occasionally someone will reference a piece and surprise me.

So, to answer your questions... I haven't found a comfortable way to verbalize to people that I have a blog. And I realized this recently while getting to know a new friend. Randomly mentioning the fact felt weird. However, I do have a blog FB fan page and include the url in my e-mail signature. I feel like that's enough of a way to say "Hey, this is part of my life and, if you're interested, check it out."

Hannah {Culture Connoisseur} said...

I link to my FB and twitter. And link all my posts to both. When people ask what I do I usually mention blogging if I think about it. Because it is something I do...and enjoy...and hope to get better at. I also made little blog business cards to hand out with it comes up and people wonder how they can read it. :)

Elle Sees said...

I didn't tell anyone for a year! I'm so shy. My family reads it and a few friends. I get so self-conscious with people thatbi know reading it. Weird!

Liz {Sequins And Stripes} said...

I love this post because I think this is something every blogger has questions about! For me, I feel sorta silly telling people out my blog - I'd rather them just figure it out for themselves. However, I do attach it to my facebook and twitter, because it is something significant about me and something that I enjoy about my daily life.

So, what is not always discussed, can be easily figured out if people care to dive into my life. The blog world is still a mystery to some!

rebecca said...

my mom cracks me up because she doesn't get it. she's always.... who are you writing this for? don't worry about it mom!

Sam {fitnessfoodandfaith.blogspot.com} said...

yes! i get so shy when people ask about it (especially co-workers), but i have started linking it to my personal fb page, so i guess i'm not that shy!

ilovecake! said...

I LOVE YOUR BLOG! and i will never stop reading! love you!

Becca {A Blonde's Logic} said...

When I first started blogging more seriously I put the links on my facebook but haven't for a while. Like you, I figured out that somethings I really don't want people to read unless they are really interested. My family knows I blog but I don't know if they read it. It's almost easier when you write for people you don't know.

Becca
http://blondeslogic.blogspot.com

Alexa said...

Pretty sure I tell everyone about my blog. Ha. And yours is fantastic! Good job!
xo
Alexa
www.theshortandthesweetofit.com

Robin @ our semi organic life said...

While I don't keep it private most of my friends and family don't read my blog. My BFF does sometimes and it can be awkward when I talk about something ... "yeah I read that on your blog"... Oh yeah. Most of my readers are strangers (I think).

sherri lynn said...

When I first started I told about 10 people, my closest friends and family. Then because I got a good response I started linking to facebook, and the feedback I've had has been great, which makes me more comfortable talking about it. I never bring it up when I'm talking to someone though... if they read it, great. If they don't, that's fine too.

Christianna said...

Well, isn't that an interesting question?! I tend to tell everyone about my blog. I have my blog address on my Etsy business cards, and such. I do not however sign my emails with it. I figure if people ask, then they get to know. It's also something I take pride in, and hell, it's even how I landed my internship with Broken Records Mag. Oh, and I love making blog friends, you get to be friends with people you normally wouldn't, and get to actually, kinda get to know them, without preconceived notions.

P.S. I love your blog, and always look forward to seeing what you are writing about! Thanks for asking this question!

Brynn {chartreuse and a twist} said...

I was definitely right out with it from the first day...close friends,
co-workers, family...I did so mostly because I wanted feedback and support. Since it is not the easiest to gain followers right away, I thought that if I had people that I know reading my blog I would feel more accountable and want to challenge myself more.
I found out that my mom was my biggest fan, reading my every post. That felt special to me...I am so close to her but we live fart apart so I love the idea of those far away people in my life being able to see what I am up to :)
I didn't go directly to FB right away...for that I wanted to feel more confident in my content...so I waited it out a bit and then linked up. This has actually inspired a lot of others to write their own blog...and I love that. A co-worker of mine kept telling me that I should write a blog, so I really owe her a lot of credit for me actually taking the leap. So, when I first started it I made it a personal goal to hopefully be able to inspire others to get out there and blog if they had something that they felt passionate about :) It's nice to see that it is starting to come to fruition!
Okay, sorry for novel of a comment here...I just love this topic :) Thanks for getting us talking!
xoxoxo brynn

la petite coquine said...

I've been writing my blog for a long time now, so nearly everyone I know knows about it, and obviously plenty of people I've never met in real life! There's a link on my FB profile these days, and I'll occasionally put one on my personal news feed-I used to be afraid to share it, but not anymore!

birdie to be said...

Great post! I feel the same way. Its not even attached to my facebook page. But I told a few select friends :) One day...

natasha {schue love} said...

Such a fun question. When I first started, I was SO nervous about telling people! Like, who do I think I am to dish out advice on fashion and home decor, but everyone who read it really liked it and that gave me confidence to be more open about it. I still only post on my personal FB about recipes or the home remodel, b/c I figure that's why most of my "real" friends would be most interested in, but I'm finding more and more people know about it and now read it regularly. I love your blog...I'm sure everyone that comes across it becomes instantly enamored with it too!

Jillian said...

I feel exactly the same way you do. I try to keep my blog separate from my "real life," but my "real life" has been changing a lot lately. Those who know are my mom, 2 best friends, and my boyfriend's sister. I do it for myself mostly. Gotta keep those creative juices flowing somehow!

Rebecca - A Daily Something said...

This is a great post and comment thread...and something I think about all the time. When I first started blogging (only about a little less than 6 months ago), I was so so nervous and felt vulnerable (still do, at times...). My friends and family were my initial and biggest fans, which felt good, because I *knew* that someone was reading (and commenting on!!) my blog posts, which felt reassuring. My best friend Susanna really encouraged me to take the initial leap of faith and start a blog. I had been whining about how I wanted to and was like "just do it..." So I did.

From the beginning I've been linking to blog posts from facebook, which was nerve-wracking, because I knew a lot of people wouldn't know what it was or wouldn't care. & I eventually started tweeting about my blog posts, too.

My closest friends and family still lovingly tease me re: my blog. They make jokes about how I can't eat my food until I take a pic of it, etc. But I love the teasing... ;)

Anyway, that was a book. lol. Like everyone else, I like this topic :D

{The Perfect Palette} said...

I love this topic. I used to not really tell anyone about my blog. It was hard to ''explain'' - but then it became a part of me and it was difficult to not share. Now everyone knows about my blog. I guess I'm just not 'in hiding' anymore. I'm proud of what I do and my blog has become my business so in essence, I share it whenever I can now. I love your analogy about two groups of friends meeting and not knowing how it will go!

xoxo, chrissy
The Perfect Palette

Allison said...

I love this post because I am the same way. And your party analogy just puts it all into perspective. I told my mom and sister about my blog after a few posts, but I just recently linked one of my posts to facebook. Ah...I was SO nervous, but got nothing but positive feedback. I'm still not going to publicize my blog because it is first and foremost for me.

Something Old, Something New said...

Great post! I debated in the beginning on how personal I would get on the blog - I tend to not get too personal but that is related to the blog being part of our business. I love getting to know other bloggers and telling them about me and my sister in our posts but I definitely try not to put too many personal details in there.

I do share it with everyone on facebook, twitter, email, etc. My family and friends are my biggest supporters and wouldn't be where we are with out them!

Drew {Coral Cafe} said...

Great question! I don't post it on facebook (Except to my new Coral Cafe page that none of my friends on FB know about-just blog friends who see it on my blog page) or even other places for people to see..yet..I'm a little nervous as to what they might think and I kind of like the fact that it's private to just us bloggers ;) It's our own little world and we seem to just get each other and have similar passions and inspirations! Maybe one day I will share it with others besides my 3 close friends and family, but for now, it's my creative outlet I share with all my bestie blog friends, like yourself! ;)

jillian m. said...

I am so glad you posted this topic. I have only told my close friends and family. I don't tell anyone else about my blog, unless their character shows me that they will be open and understanding to it. I am very picky about who I tell. Which is kind of weird because I am very open and welcoming to new readers that find me online! I don't post it on my FB, but I do use Twitter (which is intentionally meant to link to my blog).

sincerelyjill.com said...

Sorry I've been such a bad bloggy friend... no internet = no blog lovin. I thought a long time about having a blog before actually making one, and I think I was more nervous about making one than for someone to read it. I do put my posts on my facebook (but I recently deleted a lot of "friends" from my list and dwindled it down to true friends). I'm a fairly outspoken person in general so whatever I have on my blog I would say in person as well. I think your blog is lovely and why not tell people. It's your creation, be proud.

The.Red.See said...

Great post! I'm the same way, some friends and fam know about it but not everyone. It can be little TMI sometimes for everyone to know.

Eva @ Four Leaf Clover said...

My blog is not so much a journal of mine or even for me, but for the world (those in it and the world as a whole as I hope to heal the world, even a tiny bit, with my blog post). Therefore, I tell everyone and everyone, ha! But I wish everyone in the world knew about my blog so definitely no secrets.

I remember making a big deal out of telling my friends when I first set it up and I did keep it a secret before I launched it. I was worried I wouldn't go through with it if I told anyone before.

JessRaquel said...

I'm the same way, I haven't really told my family or my friends about my blog and don't really plan to. It just seems weird to me. My boyfriend knows about it but I don't think he actually reads it or anything.. I just feel weird having to explain myself on why I write the things I write..

JelenaDoll ~ said...

Hello Julie :)

I was just wondering if you could do a guest post on my blog. I will be going to europe and would be so awesome to have you! You can write about anything! But could you please get it to me by the 9th of August. at jelly_jell_91@hotmail.com. Thank you :)

Jelena ♥


I would of sent that to your email but i couldn't find it anywhere so i just put it on here :p But to be honest there are some people that i know like friends that read my blog, but i usually don't share it with everyone, only my very close friends i share my blog with :))

Vasu said...

i tell most of my friends about it, At first it was mostly about my art, crafting mainly, now its about fashion, etsy and evrytinhg, I like it more now. Its the best place to know people, you would have never known otherwise. And i dont mind telling more and more people about it.


http://www.etsy.com/shop/Rosabellebyvasu

Laura *You Stir Me* said...

goooood question. I'm still struggling with this. I want to become a wedding designer (or stylist?) so I figure the more people who know about my blog, the better, right? I have a blog email account where I sign my emails with all my blog contact info (fb, twitter, blog) but do not do so with my personal info. I don't mind my friends knowing about my blog (they're my biggest supporters when I get together with them) but it's so weird when my extended family asks about it - it's just a hard thing to explain and almost justify (as if I need to justify it!). I tend not to tell them about it as much but I do like to show my friends things I have found via the blogging world. I figure spreading the love and joy I've found through the blogging world (I'm looking at you, Julie!) is a good thing:)

Nuha said...

eek! i've been blogging for months now and the only people who know are my close family. i'm too shy to let anyone know! i guess i want to really really impress them since i invest so much time into blogging. oh, and like you said..i don't mind strangers knowing what my house looks like, but casual acquaintances would just be awkward :-/

Kris said...

I'm so happy that you posted this. I also was curious about most bloggers, do they tell anyone and everyone they know? Are they selective? Do they only tell family? I completely agree with two different lists of invites. It's a weird thing isn't it? Now that my blog is up and going, I have told two of my closest friends. They both loved it and wondered why I hadn't shared sooner! The one thing I do know is you have to be all in. 100% honest and never embarrassed. I love you blog and am now following. Oh, and I found you through Mingle Monday.

http://www.sincerelyarizona.blogspot.com/

the outspoken introvert said...

I have been struggling with this myself. Although my blog is pretty anonymous to most, people that know me do read it. I sometimes find that it inhibits my writing.

I started my blog to have a creative outlet and to be able to write what I feel without reservation. I find that the reservation grows when more people I know in "real life" tune it to my blabberings. I'm really glad you posted this, and you're not alone in feeling the way you're feeling.

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Thanks for the lovely thoughts, I appreciate them all!